Seek Advice and Guard Your Tongue (Proverbs 20:18; 21:23)

record and pin me. So, it's just me that it's recording. There we go. All right. So, today we're gonna I'm gonna hit two verses and one sets up the other verse. Um, and both are in Proverbs. Um, so and they're both uh next to each other uh chapter-wise. And so, we're going to first talk about Proverbs uh chapter 20 and verse 18. and then I'm going to shoot over to something that's a struggle certainly for me and I would think for most people and that's Proverbs 21 and 23. And so let me read them. So here we are. Solomon in all of his wisdom and and you got and everybody knows that in in and I'm not going to talk about it being the built-in daily devotional, but what I am going to say is that Solomon uh in in the book of Proverbs, there's a whole lot of talking about planning.

And so um every no one should take the position of well it doesn't matter what I do because God directs my steps. Well he does direct your steps but but Solomon spends an entire book talking to us about planning and knowing your way and knowing your crops and knowing your numbers. And so there's some importance to doing that. We have to do our part as well too. All right. So here we are. So, Proverbs 20 uh and uh 20 and 18 says, and uh let's make sure I'm in the right spot here. I am not in the right spot. 2018 says, "Plans are established by seeking advice." So, if you wage war, obtain guidance.

And so, pretty simple scripture. I don't think there's a whole lot a hidden meaning there. I don't think if you broke it down in the Hebrew versus the Greek, you're going to find a whole lot. I don't think you need a a strong concordance to break out that plans are established by seeking advice. So, a we should plan. How should we do that? Talk to people who know more than we do. Um if we plan on going and waging war, right? We should also obtain guidance, right? So, if we're planning something, seek guidance. If we're about to go into battle, then we should absolutely get it.

Right? So, this is what Solomon is saying. And so now we're going to go over into verse 21, chapter 21 and verse 23. And this is the part that I feel like a lot of us have struggled with in the past. And I continue to struggle myself to this very day. And it simply says um those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. So how do these two verses go together? Well, if you seek guidance, you plan on what you're going to talk about prior to talking about it, well, then we can eliminate some of the calamity that's going to befold or come on us based on the fact that we failed to do chapter 20 and verse 18.

And and what I find interesting in this verse is that is that I'm in the NIV is that he uses the word Solomon uses the word mouth and tongue. It's like why does he do both? It's like why does he say it? I'm like he's obviously talking about our speech, right? So he says those who guard their mouths and their tongue. So that's it's the same thing. He's talking about the same thing, but really there's two separate issues here. You could be absolutely a thousand% correct in what you're saying, but the way you deliver it loses the entire room. Loses the attention of whoever you're talking to.

So sometimes it's not just what we say, but it's also how we say it, where we say it at, how it's coming across. You could be completely right and still lose the argument. Why? Not because what you said wasn't accurate, because of how you said it, how you delivered it, where you were when you delivered it could have completely ruined your message altogether. And I think that's the reason why Solomon says guard your mouth and your tongue because both those things go hand in hand together. So, if we know we're going to have a difficult conversation, we and we all have them.

Kids, brother, parents, co-orker, church, family member, whoever it might be. We talked about forgiveness last week. All week, if we know we're going to have a difficult conversation, let's get some advice. Let's seek some counsel. Let's let's ask someone else. Not only can you help me on what I should say, h how maybe should I present it to them? Because ultimately the goal is not you're not trying to win. You're trying to help someone. Maybe you're trying to improve someone. Maybe you're trying to show someone that instead of going down this path, maybe they need to go down this path.

Or maybe you're you're going to someone because they did something to you to hurt you and you want to explain to them where the boundary line should be. And so what we should really do is take these two verses together. If we know we're going to go into battle, if we know we're going to have a conversation, let's go get some advice. Right? I mean, I've been a dad now for how many years? 27 years. 27 years. But it still doesn't mean I know exactly what to say to my oldest daughter. So, sometimes I have to go, "Hey babe, uh, we need to talk to our daughter.

Should I do it? Should you do it? How should we do it? Where should we do it?" And we we we've grown wise enough to come to each other to have that conversation as opposed to one of us just absolutely blowing it. It doesn't mean what we were going to say wasn't accurate. It just may not have come from the right person or it might not have been said the right way. So there you go. Proverbs 20 and 18 21 and 23. Thoughts, comments, suggestions, mic drop. Um, I don't I don't know if you realized it, but with the last point you made about saying the right thing at the right time, that's actually also a proverb.

It's I know it's in there twice. One of them is Proverbs 15:23. I'll do NIV cuz you're reading NIV. A person finds joy in giving an apt reply and how good is a timely word. And then uh another the other one in Proverbs is uh it goes something like uh a timely word is like apples and a silver setting behind or on like a t I'm kind of butchering it but the idea is that it's like a perfect table setting and that when you say the right thing at the right time to the right person when you present it the right way to the room it's it's like uh as like the Bible would describe like living water or like honey to your lips.

It just like hits the right spot at the right time. Amen. Amen. Yeah. So, Solomon actually knew what he was talking about. It's crazy. All right. Well, if any there's anybody else who has a comment on the scripture, speak now or forever hold your peace. Am I coming through or no? Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, Dave. want to add um not to quote any particular scripture but to stay in line with today um there's Tik Toks I even still get to this day but something about basically keeping score and then I forget the book I was literally reading it the other day I'm just having a brain fire but about loving God loving your brother if you love God love your brother love your neighbor the first you know two commandments that really set the foundation for everything else but when it comes to, as you say, going into battle, going into war, preparing for war, seeking advice, planning, and it's like you said, it's not about winning.

And sometimes our ego, our pride gets in the way. Oh, I have to win, have to win. But then you have to realize this is the person you you're committed to. This is the person you love. It's not about winning. It's about boundaries of anything has to be set. And it's conveying the message properly, delivering it properly with love, you know, consideration, kindness, meekness, gentleness, and going back scriptures weeks ago and some of your studies that we've done in the morning about meekness and gentleness and just staying in line with what you just went in with today.

And it's it's a struggle. It's a struggle every day because your ego that that pride just wants to come through and you want to win, but it's not about winning. It's just Yeah, it's about loving. That's what it is. Yep. All right. Awesome. Thanks, Dave. All right. Well, let's uh it's 9:26. Let's bow our heads. Let's pray and uh and we'll start. We get our day going. So, Father, thank you so much for uh for new beginnings. We pray for uh we pray for the strength to guard our mouths and our tongue. Lord, we pray that uh that we would put two verses together.

Uh this book is incredible. And even just the book of Proverbs, there's so much in there, Lord, that we can walk out and live in our in our daily lives. And so, Lord, I just pray that if we have that conversation that we have to have that we would take time, we would bring it to you in prayer. We ask the Holy Spirit the best way to guide that. Go to a friend. Go to a fellow brother or sister in Christ to get some advice on what to say, when to say, how to say it. Lord, we we we know that the the goal is not to win. The goal is to move people closer to you.

So, Father, I just pray that you would give us the strength and courage and wisdom to do exactly that. Walk with us today. Guide us as always, Father. We We want to be a a we want to be walking beacons, billboards, Lord, for the kingdom, Lord. And that's I pray that every one of us has an opportunity to do that. We love you. We praise you. And as always, in your son Jesus Christ's mighty name we pray. Amen. Amen. All right. See you guys tomorrow. Same time. Thanks. Thank you. Have a blessed day. Thank you. God bless you.

Transcript generated from the recording and lightly edited for readability.